For those of you that don't know, Brandon and I started a church plant here in Mansfield about a year and a half ago. During that time, needless to say, we have faced our fair share of challenges of pastoring a small church. Don't get me wrong, we have enjoyed the challenge, and thoroughly LOVE what we do. Not to mention that God had truly blessed our family over this time. We have grown closer to Him as a family in search for what He truly wants us to do, as well as learning to listen to God in our daily lives on HOW to do the things He wants us to do.
I have truly been amazed at what I have learned from God in just being still, and listening to what He has to say. I have been leading a bible study the last 9 weeks or so using Beth Moore's Esther: It's Tough Being a Woman. Man, oh man, is this one DEAD ON, girls! I have been absolutely blown away by the correlation in biblical times, to today on how relevant the issues are!! But I tell you what, I am impressed with the dedication of the women who have embarked on this journey of Esther with me. They have all been so patient with me in letting me mess up along the path of leaderhsip, and for that, I am grateful. While I have been embarking on Esther's journey, I have also started to keep a prayer journal. And girls, let me tell you - man, God he is a talkin'!!! Or at least I'm finally sitting still and keeping quiet long enough to hear what he has to say.
I know it must seem as if I am rambling, but stay with me girls, I'm going somewhere, I promise! I have started to change the way that I pray for things. Instead of praying for that "thing" and waiting for it, I have started praying for God to give me that "thing" in His timing, and waiting on God. Man, oh man, how that little prayer has changed my life. Changed OUR lives. Forever. Starting now.
You see, for the last few months, B and I have been looking at houses, but we haven't been able to find one we liked, or have never really given the lending our "full attention." Untill now, it never made sense to me. I was always praying for that perfect house to come along. But I was saying the WRONG prayer. I didn't need to wait on the house. I needed to wait upon God. Once I changed my prayer and decided to wait upon the Lord.....things started to come into focus. We were praying and asking for the wrong things. We needed to wait up on the Lord to reveal His timing for moving, and houses, and mortgages. As soon as I started praying that....then B pop's up with the question of the day. Let me share that conversation with you. I'll color code who said what. (Reader's Digest version, this thing is long enough already.)
"What do you think of me resigning from my current job to pastor full time?"
"Uh, hmm, well, I don't know."
"I just feel that God is telling me that it is time we stepped out and took a leap of faith in the church."
"Well, babe, if that is what you feel God is leading you towards, then I think we pack up, move back into the old house, and we become a one-income family."
So folks, that's what we are doing. B is officially resigning from his "paying" job to pastor our church full time. And we are officially a one-income family. Talk about scary!! We've done the numbers, and are making some sacrifices to allow that to happen. We've been blessed throughout the past year to have paid off some debt, and above all else, I know that if this is what God is calling us to do, then He will not let us fail. We are nervous, excited, calm, scared, and peaceful all in one.
How does this relate to Esther, you ask? I am reminded of how God takes care of us when we are faithful to follow what He has planned for us. To truly follow our destiny. Remember, this: "And who knows but that you have come to a royal position for such a time as this?" Esther 4:14. I mean, this is is. My husband was made by God, for just this time. A time such as this. To be able to have the honor to lead a church for the Lord. And that I get the honor of standing by him, and embarking along that journey with him.
My father-in-law laid it out best in a sermon he preached last week. When God had promised Joshua the promise land, he had to cross a raging river. God told his people that across the river was what He had promised them. As soon as they stepped into the river, it calmed down.
Sometimes, instead of calming the river before we step into it....He just wants us to have the faith to put one foot in before He calms it. Well, God, here we go......we're jumping in....both feet first!!
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